Planned Parenthood's $8 billion AbortionPlex (satire)

Planned Parenthood announced Tuesday the grand opening of its long-planned $8 billion Abortionplex, 

a sprawling abortion facility that will allow the organization to terminate unborn lives 

with an efficiency never before thought possible.

During a press conference, Planned Parenthood president Cecile Richards told reporters 

that the new state-of-the-art fetus-killing facility located in the nation's heartland offers quick, easy, in-and-out abortions to all women, and represents a bold reinvention of the group's long-standing mission and values.