Facebook is CIA

Facebook junkies rejoice,
a movie is due out this October which will shed light on the origin of the social networking behemoth.
I'm sure they will paint a picture of a couple cyber-geek outcasts whom mischievously sling code
and bang heads in the process of becoming online deity's only rival to Tom of myspace.

Those who vigorously update their status on the whim that their mundane activity will spur notoriety amongst their peers, with such statements as:
"Bored :("
or
"So hungover"
will surely be in line to witness the birth of their almighty virtual clubhouse.
Sidekick nation will surely provide the ambient lighting for movie goers
as tweens update their statuses in theater similar
to yuppies making phone calls at baseball games.

But as you enjoy the splendor that is Justin Timberlake and Co.
remember this:

Facebook was founded on deception and lies,
from the beginning it's creator Mark Zuckerberg proved himself to be a malevolent rat.
An online Milli Vanilli who's trumpet plays the notes which others had hatched.
Charged with breaching security, violating copyrights, and violating individual privacy
for his original idea: Facemash
3 Harvard classmates came to him with their idea of a new site in need of coding.
Zuckerberg stole their idea and capitalized on it making an alternate version
and delaying the progress of their site,
telling a confidant via instant message that he'll:
"fuck the dating site people over and quit on them right before I told them I'd have it done."
in future emails when asked what he was going to do about the proposed website he remarked:
"I'm going to fuck them, probably in the ear"
This dispute would later result in a $65 million settlement

Zuckerberg would also gloat via instant message
that:
"if you ever need info about anyone at Harvard, just ask"
boasting he had
"over 4,000 emails, pictures, addresses, SNS"
and adding
"they "trust me", dumb fucks"
This just gives you an idea of the mindset of the man behind the mask
and is something to keep in mind next time your phone rings from an annoying telemarketer who wants to send you away on your dream vacation.
For the Facebook creator isn't just sharing the info with his buddies,
but with corporate America.
So they can tailor specific ads to your specs, and give your contact info to advertisers.

So what if you get a barrage of emails and obnoxious phone calls,
these status updates are valuable damn it.... correct?
Well, it's also important to keep in mind that $12.7 million dollars was funded as seed money
by a close associate of the ceo of In-Q-tel
a venture capital firm who invests in high-tech companies
for the sole purpose of providing the CIA with the latest in information technology.
The CIA even actively seeks minions to help mine its data on facebook.
You must understand that if users discovered that In-Q-Tel
(a company which feeds the CIA its intelligence information)
bankrolls facebook,
it would stir up a slew of questions
as to why the CIA needs every bit of our information.
The answer is DARPA
the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency
which aims to prevent and avoid surprise for the nations defense.
Out of this grew the IAO
or Information Awareness Office
which tracks and monitors threats to national security.
So yippie skippies, it's for our own good,
until you realize that the government now considers those who actively voice their opinion on bureaucratic decisions a "threat".
Meaning they write the rules, you abide by them, or else...

Ron Bowes of skullsecurity.org
compiled 100 million facebook user profiles
into a nifty little 2.7Gb downloadable care care package for the establishment available here.
Meaning if these users ever go private, it will not matter.
He remarked:
"Facebook helpfully informs you that
"[a]nyone can opt out of appearing here by changing their Search privacy settings"
— but that doesn't help much anymore considering I already have them all
(and you will too, when you download the torrent).
Suckers!"

To put quite bluntly, the government needs not invent a technology capable of reading minds
when websites such as Twitter, Myspace & Facebook exist.

Forfeit your likeness here, er... Register:
Facebooks privacy policy

Facebooks terms of use