Down with the Bling!

It's no surprise most mainstream rap artists live in the lap of luxury,
or at least that's what they'd like you to believe?
The entire hip-hop game is one big contest to see whose dick is bigger.
Musicians in general have always worn outrageous outfits & accessories which either become their specific trademark or a subject of ridicule but either way it gets their name out.
Case in point: Elton John

or more recently Lady Gaga...

and for further proof: Liberace,

the majority couldn't recall a single one of his song titles but are aware of his excessive flamboyance.

In the hip-hop world the most redundant trend is to possess outrageous bling.
What better way to exert ones dominance then to wear someones annual salary on your arm or neck?
From T-Pain's famed "Big Ass Chain"

to Rick Ross's self-portrait

Rappers just can not get enough.

Some jewelry becomes a staple of a rappers gimmick such as:
Slick Rick's eye-patch

or Flavor Flav's clock


But most of these cats come off looking like
Mr. T

or the Bishop Don Magic Juan


These tactics may work for those associated with Mexican Drug Cartels
but with such corny impostors in the mix, some are beginning to aim a tad too high.
When you start "blinging out" such mundane items as
Corn Flakes

Crayons

Obsolete Nintendo cartridges

Bart Simpson

& cigarettes

You have certainly gone too far.

Far more preposterous is the fact that
in light of our shattered economy rap artists whose album sales have taken a dive
are continuing the trend, with fake knock-off jewelry.
Replacing diamonds with cubic zirconias.
Maybe this is why many rappers have turned to tax evasion?
Even the "Hip-Hop's Crown Jewels" auction to sell the bling of hip-hop heavyweights for charity
has been canceled indefinitely due to lack of interest from buyers.
At this point in a failed economy most rappers jewelry just serves as a target for thieves,
such as in the case of:
Timbaland's bling (who may have been so distraught over his loss he considered suicide),
or the Bamm-Bamm bling.

Even in other forms of media, bling has been controversial.
Such is the case with reports like Lindsay Lohan stealing $500k worth of Dior jewelry,
a cross being stolen from a gold coffin of gangland killer Carl Williams,
or the highly televised celebrity "Bling Ring" thefts.

Seriously, you know the fad has gone too far when these harlequins are sticking bling in
their mouths

and eyes


Long story short, despite being ridiculous, it's one thing if you're wearing this garbage to show off your bankroll
(although in the words of the late Biggie Smalls, rule number one is:
"never let no one know how much dough you hold")
but it's truly another ordeal entirely when you're wearing costume jewelry like a clown.
For Shame!!!
and for the record: don't Blood Diamonds ring a bell?
What's worse, African American's wearing fugazi jewels?
Or furthermore wearing jewelry which further condemns their people?